Shen Yi Di Nu Chapter 242

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The Future Wife is too Bold

Her forehead was covered in black lines, “Medicine is not a returnable good.” After she said this, she rolled her eyes, “You promised that you would not ask.”

“I did not ask.” He spoke as though this were natural, “I was just expressing my feelings. My wife has this ability, and I don’t even get a chance to be happy. Next time, will you be able to pull out a pile of bank notes for me.”

Xuan Tian Ming looked to be speaking casually, but Feng Yu Heng knew that this was just trying to reduce the pressure of the situation.

As a general, the soldiers under his command were just as valuable as his life. Not that two-thirds had fallen, how could he not be anxious.

“Alright.” She no longer spoke and waved to Xuan Tian Ming, “Come here.” Seeing him move his wheelchair over, she said: “Do as I do and open up all these boxes. Gather up all of the pills inside the packs. Also pour out all of the pills inside these bottles. Split them into groups of ten and wrap them up in paper. In a while, deliver them to the soldiers who were poisoned and have them ingest them.”

Xuan Tian Ming nodded, and immediately began working.

Feng Yu Heng felt around inside her sleeve for a while, and Xuan Tian Ming clicked his tongue when he saw the girl pull out needles and tubes.

The people who were still conscious would be able to ingest the medicine, but those who had fainted could only be induced to vomit by infusion. What Feng Yu Heng feared the most was this. After all, there were many people who were fainted, roughly fifteen thousand. If she had to give each and every one of them an infusion, how long would that take?

Fortunately, her space had its self-replenishing ability. She would not have any problem with running out of supplies. She began to consider if she went to teach that old doctor how to perform an intramuscular injection, would it be enough?

“Go find some reliable people for me.” She was truly out of options and could only ask Xuan Tian Ming for help, “Just me working alone will not be fast enough. I need to quickly teach the method of giving these injections, so they can help me with this.”

Xuan Tian Ming thought a little then said: “It would be better to have Huang Quan, Bai Ze and Ban Zou learn it. First, they are definitely reliable, and secondly, they should definitely be able to learn quickly.”

“Alright.” Feng Yu Heng also thought this way. The people she was familiar with were best, and they would not be too surprised by what they learned.

Feng Yu Heng thought about it and reached into her sleeve once more.

Following that, Xuan Tian Ming saw something that shook his three world views, as Feng Yu Heng very awkwardly pulled a very large… butt from her sleeve!

If he were not still sitting in his wheelchair, he really would have wanted to go berserk!

He really wanted to slap this damn girl to death!

“What is that thing?”

“Hehe!” Feng Yu Heng looked at him and giggled, saying: “A butt.” As she said this, she patted it a couple times, causing Xuan Tian Ming to want to spank her.

“What exactly is that thing?” He felt as though his life was being challenged. What sort of wife had he found?

“It’s just a butt!” Feng Yu Heng poked it a couple time, continuing: “But it’s a fake one. It’s just a model. I need to use it to teach Huang Quan and them how to give the soldiers outside intramuscular injections.”

Xuan Tian Ming was unable to understand what intramuscular injections meant, but he understood the other part, “You mean to say that that the people outside need to have needles inserted into that place?”

Feng Yu Heng nodded, “That’s right.”

He became speechless.

“Can you not be so feudal?”

“Hm? What did you say?” He did not understand what feudal meant.

Feng Yu Heng explained to him, “What I meant was that your way of thinking can’t be too limited. I am a doctor, and my duty is to treat illnesses. Regardless of whether it’s for a man or a woman, they are all the same without any difference. In my eyes, there is only one type of person, and that is a patient. When doctor’s treat patients, they do not differentiate between men and women. Regardless of what area or what organ, what I look at is the illness, not the person.”

When she spoke, she was very resolute, causing Xuan Tian Ming to be a little moved. Indeed, the doctors for daughters of the palace were also male, and there was nothing inappropriate when imperial concubines gave birth. If it was something those old guys were able to accept, why could he not accept it?

Thinking of this, Xuan Tian Ming no longer refused. Instead, he only looked at the hand that held the butt then involuntarily averted his gaze. He only thought to himself that this wife could not be looked at normally. He definitely had to become more and more accustomed to her.

Huang Quan, Bai Ze and Ban Zou were very quickly called inside. Feng Yu Heng gathered them together and began to quickly teach them the method of performing an intramuscular injection.

Fortunately, intramuscular injections were not considered clinical medicine. Although they were considered laymen, fortunately, they were sufficiently smart. They also had learned martial arts, which gave them a clear understanding of the human anatomy. It was especially helpful when Feng Yu Heng gave them an alternative explanation that gave that an even better understanding, “Just treat these as a new type of hidden weapon. I will teach you how to use it. After you’ve learned how to use it, go out and harm people!”

Xuan Tian Ming could not bear to continue listening, increasing the pace at which he opened the boxes of medicine. Very quickly, he opened the majority of the boxes.

“Heng Heng, how many pills should each person take?” He asked, “I will send out the ones that I have already opened up.”

Feng Yu Heng did not even turn around to respond: “Two pills per person.”

He nodded and turned his wheelchair around, taking the pills out of the tent.

After Feng Yu Heng gave them repeated lectures and demonstrations, and she determined that the three were already capable of performing simple intramuscular injections, she finally let out a sigh of relief.

She then brought out a pile of syringes and iodine. Dividing the pile into four shares, she gave each of them one share and left one for herself. She then said: “Let’s go and get to work!”

Just as these words were spoken, the opening of the tent was suddenly lifted, and Xuan Tian Ming shouted from the outside: “Quickly come out, something seems off about the medicine!”

Feng Yu Heng was given a large shock and immediately said: “That’s impossible!” At the same time, she had already rushed outside.

There was chaos outside, as the soldiers who had given out medicine examined those who had been given medicine. They discovered that those who had not fainted from the poison had mysteriously become even more poisoned after taking the medicine. One after another, they fell into a deep sleep. Their faces became even more blue and purple, filling people’s hearts with shock.

“What exactly is going on?” A soldier began crying. Hugging one of the soldiers who had fainted after taking the medicine, he cried: “Brother! Brother, wake up!”

All of the soldiers turned their gazes towards Feng Yu Heng. Although nobody said a word, their gazes were clearly filled with suspicion.

Feng Yu Heng was also confused. All she had given them was vomit inducing medicine, so how could their poisoning symptoms have gotten more severe?

She knelt down and randomly checked the pulse of a soldier.

There was no mistake, their symptoms had worsened. She could ascertain that there was definitely no problem with her medicine, which meant that the problem either lay with the soldiers giving the medicine or…

Suddenly, she turned her attention to a bowl of clear water “There is a problem with the water.” She reached out and grabbed a bowl, bring it next to her nose. After smelling it, she was even more certain: “It’s the water that was poisoned.”

Qian Li was startled then immediately recalled “That’s right! Even the person making the food was poisoned, which means that it was not him who used the poison. It must be the well that was tampered with by someone.”

The soldiers came to a sudden realization. But of course, county princess Ji An had come to save them, so how could she possibly harm them. If there was a problem, it would be with the water that had been used to ingest the medicine.

Feng Yu Heng raised her head and looked towards the sky. Just as everyone was wondering what she was looking at, she reached out towards a soldier “Hand me the bow on your back.”

The soldier was momentarily stunned, but he still removed the bow and gave it to Feng Yu Heng.

They then saw her draw the bowstring and aim at the sky. Without aiming too much, she suddenly loosed the arrow.

In the blink of an eye, a white pigeon fell from the sky. The arrow had pierced its wing, but it did not injure the body.

Xuan Tian Ming immediately understood her thoughts and suddenly rose into the air right before the pigeon fell to the ground. Catching the white pigeon in his hand, it prevented the bird from dying on impact with the ground.

Feng Yu Heng held the bowl of water in her hands, and Xuan Tian Ming placed the white pigeon in the water. The pigeon took two gulps before its body suddenly turned blue. Immediately following this, its head tilted and died.

Everyone that saw this inhaled sharply. It truly was a problem with the water.

Qian Li clenched his fists, as he panted with anger, “There are a total of six wells in the military camp. Could they have been poisoned?”

“That must be it.” Feng Yu Heng nodded, “There was no need for the person who committed this act to gamble on luck. Since they took action, they must have poisoned all six wells.” She did not wait any longer and said to Huang Quan and the others: “Quickly, begin the injections.” At the same time, she ordered Qian Li: “Go get water from the river. On the way here, I saw a river along the mountain path. Water in the river circulates, so there will not be any problems. Fetch the river water, and continue to give medicine to those that can ingest it. This is a vomit inducing medicine, and the same is in the needles. Once they are used, vomiting should quickly occur as a reaction. Find some people to take care of the clean up work.” She gave out orders while beginning her work.

Thus the soldiers saw a scene that was “unbearable to look at,” as county princess Ji An led the way in removing people’s pants, more importantly, they were men’s pants.

Xuan Tian Ming, however, did not have any reaction. Instead, he collaborated with Feng Yu Heng and began ordering his subordinates: “You guys, half of you will go take care of those who have received injections. The other half will help with removing their pants.”

Seeing that the needle needed to be injected into the butt, they understood and complied, all of them going to help.

But even if there were a large number of people helping, the Feng Yu Heng’s group of four gradually began to feel their bodies grow tired.

This was ten thousand people. She nearly felt as though she would no longer be able to raise it up any longer.

The syringes needed to be discarded after being used. She had no method of avoiding too many people, so she could only have Huang Quan and her group surround her, as she pulled out even more syringes from her space.

Huang Quan endured and did not ask, while Ban Zou only smirked. Bai Ze, however, rolled his eyes and said: “I already knew that you were odd from that time in the mountains of the Northwest.”

After each injection and after each pill was ingested, the soldiers began to vomit, and the other soldiers began to clean it up. Slowly, the smell in the military camp became dreadful. Feng Yu Heng was unable to endure and decided to pull out a medical mask to cover her face. The four people continued giving injections until the middle of the night. Ban Zou was so tired that he could no longer raise his arms, but they finally finished giving the final injection.

The four dropped to the ground, as they were so tired that they could no longer move.

Xuan Tian Ming picked her up lovingly, while Qian Li also had soldiers go support the other three. He originally wanted to let her rest, but Feng Yu Heng said: “The injection contained apomorphine, but it only induces vomiting. It has no ability to clear out the poison.” She leaned against Xuan Tian Ming’s wheelchair and helplessly said: “In reality, the best method is to pump their stomachs. It would be fine if you wanted me to do it for ten people, but twenty thousand or more, even if I died of exhaustion, I would not be able to do it for twenty thousand people. Even if I could complete it, the soldiers would not be able to wait for that long.”

At this time, the old doctor also walked over, and Feng Yu Heng waved to him. When he arrived in front of her, she said: “Old sir, it is not poison from a zhen.”


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20 thoughts on “Shen Yi Di Nu Chapter 242

  1. Oh my god! The butt!!! Now, be good, XTM, or A-Heng will you give you a very painful injection!!! Keke! πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£

    Thanks for the chapter, springrain and sponsors!!!

    Liked by 9 people

  2. This was really outrageous!!! I am really grateful that XTM was a open-minded person or else there would have been lot of drama hear!!!! I really can’t wait for the next update!!!
    Thank you for updating!!

    Liked by 4 people

  3. ~15000 fainted patients. Only 4 people(Yu Heng, Huang Quan, Bai Ze and Ban Zou) for infusions. I assume that they are just injecting some shots instead of real infusions which take at least 30 minutes.
    ~3750 shots/doctor at a rate of 3 shots/minute means at least 20 hours worth of injections without break.
    Let’s not even talk about the heap of packages/garbage after using those goods.

    I should probably stop bothering with logic and numbers. γƒ˜οΌˆγ€‚β–‘Β°οΌ‰γƒ˜

    Anyway… Now that it’s not poison from a zhen, it’s antidote-making-time (=`ω´=)

    Liked by 4 people

    1. Thanks for the chapter! Despite the severity of the situation, this was hilarious! You know, there is a manga about this story. Only a few chapters have been translated & I don’t know where the raws reach, but can you imagine this chapter in manga? πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚

      Liked by 2 people

  4. You see.. Xuan Tian Ming didn’t ask (question that is). But really, only abnormal person can handle Feng Yu Heng mystical sleeves pull out fake “butt”, a very large at that. Indeed are a perfect match. I wonder how that deity with miraculous hand Qing Shuang would feel after learned she is faced against mystical sleeves. I bet she will hit her head on the wall to prevent herself become crazy. Xuan Tian Ming, you really have brilliant idea there, with Feng Yu Heng mystical sleeves, self-replenish ability, pulling out bank notes is nothing to Feng Yu Heng.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. My like this part:

    Feng Yu Heng raised her head and looked towards the sky. Just as everyone was wondering what she was looking at, she reached out towards a soldier β€œHand me the bow on your back.”

    The soldier was momentarily stunned, but he still removed the bow and gave it to Feng Yu Heng.

    They then saw her draw the bowstring and aim at the sky. Without aiming too much, she suddenly loosed the arrow.

    In the blink of an eye, a white pigeon fell from the sky. The arrow had pierced its wing, but it did not injure the body.

    Thanks for the chapter, Sponsors and SpringRain Translators. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 4 people

  6. It’s a panicky situation, but I am really laughing till the end.
    “Tian Ming saw something that shook his three world views…” ,I never expected that it’s a BUTT (fake)
    LOLssss… I thought A-Heng pulled a cabinet, big one!
    Now… dude, do you still want to request A-Heng to pull something from her magical sleeve??
    This ‘butt scene’ might give every soldier a trauma…specially those who suffered under the hands of Princess Yu. In the future, they might hope that they should’ve died before the treatment happened.
    Ahahahhaahah…

    Thanks muchoo…Translator-sama…
    πŸ˜€

    Liked by 4 people

    1. A-Heng: Just treat these as a new type of hidden weapon. I will teach you how to use it. After you’ve learned how to use it, go out and harm people!

      Huang Quan: *After this… will I still be able to get married?* (T.T)~
      Bai Ze: *th-thousands of butts*
      Ban Zou: Hidden weapon…hmmm *looks at Bai Ze* *smiles evilly*
      Tian Ming: (YY.)` oh gosh..who’s wife is this??
      Huang Quan,Ban Zou & Bai Ze : *looks at Tian Ming* *master’s brain collapsed, this is the power of butt*
      πŸ˜€

      Liked by 4 people

      1. You know, pulling out a butt from sleeve in purity-obsessed ancient china should considered not hidden, but ultimate weapon)))) I doubt anyone will be able to respond to next attack)))

        Like

  7. I almost laugh till dead. *LoL* I want to see XTM’s face when he saw A-Heng pulled the (fake) butt off from her magical sleeve. His reaction must be priceless. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ I really love this chapter and this couple. They are so lively even in this kind of situation. I’m waiting time that A-Heng will tell her secret to her (future) husband before he will die from curiosity. Hahahahahahahahahhahahahahaaa….

    Thank you for the chapter.😘

    Liked by 4 people

  8. I feel so bad for laughing in this situation but literally, all 5 of them are throwing in humor. “Next time, will you be able to pull out a pile of bank notes for me.” like cmon…LOL
    I literally love this squad. THANK YOU FOR THE CHAPTER!

    Like

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